¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

HOMEWORK

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2021-02-09 553

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

What makes you interested in playing computer games?
-> Fun activities in computer games made me interested in playing computer games.
First, each computer games have fun activities or interesting stories.
And these things make computer games very interesting to me.
Second, I can spend my time for doing some activities in computer games.
If I feel bored, I can spend my time for doing some activities in computer games.
So fun activities in computer games made me interested in playing computer games.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John! Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon!

Fun activities in computer games made me interested in playing computer games.
>> Fun activities on the computer makes me interested in it. 

First, each computer games have fun activities or interesting stories.
>> First, each computer game has fun activities or interesting stories.

And these things make computer games very interesting to me.
>> These things makes computer games interesting to me. 

Second, I can spend my time for doing some activities in computer games.
>> I can spend most of my time playing games on my computer. 

If I feel bored, I can spend my time for doing some activities in computer games.
>> If I feel bored, I can just easily use my computer to be entertained. 

So fun activities in computer games made me interested in playing computer games.
>> Fun activities make me interested in playing computer games. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
105562 [2/8]Homework ¹Ú*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2021-02-09 1
105561 My assignment Çã*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-09 496
105560 Where is your collection? ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-09 384
105559 If you moved to another country, what things would you miss... ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-09 587
105558 Homework (221) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-09 601
105557 HOMEWORK FOR 02.09 Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-09 601
105556 Thing that annoys me the most ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-02-09 561
105555 What are the advantages of voting? ±è*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-09 0
105554 Homework ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-02-09 0
105553 Hm Àå*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-09 416
105552 Precious time ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-09 886
105551 Food that I am interested in how to cook ½É*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-09 0
105550 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-02-09 376
105549 Which is more powerful between feelings of love and feelings of... ±è*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-09 392
105548 home work ½É*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-02-09 7
105547 My favorite musical is \"The phantom of the opera\" ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-02-09 383
105546 I... ¹®*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-09 3
105545 What annoys you the most? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-02-09 0
105544 What is your routine after you wake up in the morning? ¼Û*·É ¿Ï·á 2021-02-09 483
105543 I... ¹®*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-09 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04