¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

The advantages and disadvantages of taking risks

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ø
2021-02-22 1452

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Taking risk can give us responsibilities and wisdom to live our life. But it can also frustrate us and we should spend hard time. So we have to be serious when we have to take a risk and choose the right way to us. But whatever we choose regret follows so we should be ready to accept things after that,

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Heidi! You're right. It comes with advantages and disadvantages so we should be careful when it comes to making decisions. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon!

Taking risk can give us responsibilities and wisdom to live our life. 
>> CORRECT

But it can also frustrate us and we should spend hard time. 
>>But it can also frustrate us and let us have a hard time. 

So we have to be serious when we have to take a risk and choose the right way to us. 
>> So we have to be serious when we have to take a risk and choose the right thing for us. 

But whatever we choose regret follows so we should be ready to accept things after that,
>> But whatever we choose, regret follows so we should be ready to accept things after that.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
105680 homework ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 642
105679 What qualities friend I want ±¸*È¿ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 0
105678 Toeic right answer º¯*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 787
105677 Age is just a number À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 2
105676 Homework0216 ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 847
105675 homework ÀÌ*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 690
105674 Tuesday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 653
105673 02.16.21 About Plastic surgery and Beauty . È«*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 674
105672 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 2
105671 Self-directed learning ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 713
105670 Homework ÀÓ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 717
105669 Homework ÀÓ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 578
105668 Homework ÀÓ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 653
105667 English Homework 27 ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 595
105666 homework_21.02.09 ÀÌ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 1
105665 Kindly answer this question in essay form. What are the things... ÇÑ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 595
105664 (HW) Things can go wrong when you travel. Have you had any bad... Á¤*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 624
105663 Homework º¯*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 5
105662 If I could go out with a celebrity somewhere Á¶*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-16 1
105661 What is your greatest accomplishment as of today? Á¤*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-02-15 617

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04