¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

If you are going to save up some money for something, what would it be and why?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Á¤
2021-03-15 4460

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I want to buy my own house especially in seoul. The prices of buildings in seoul increase every year deeply. so I want to buy it as soon as possible. if I have a job, I loan the money and buy house. That's more efficient than saving money.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Tobby! Investing in a house is very good especially for your future. Keep it up!

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon!

I want to buy my own house especially in seoul. 
>> I want to buy my own house especially in Seoul. 

The prices of buildings in seoul increase every year deeply. 
>> The prices of buildings in Seoul increase every year deeply so I want to buy one as soon as possible. 

so I want to buy it as soon as possible.
>>CONNECT WITH THE SENTENCE ABOVE. 

 if I have a job, I loan the money and buy house. 
>> If I have a job, I will loan some money and buy a house. 

That's more efficient than saving money.
>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
106511 Tom Bodett, an American author, voice actor, and radio hos said:... Ȳ*Á¶ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-12 4942
106510 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-03-12 4478
106509 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-03-12 6307
106508 mythical creature ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-03-12 4419
106507 HOMEWORK °­*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-12 5650
106506 Homework °­*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-12 3861
106505 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-12 0
106504 Homework0312 ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-03-12 4483
106503 My favorite toys was clays. ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-03-12 5454
106502 What would you like to see when you visit a park? ¼Û*·É ¿Ï·á 2021-03-12 4145
106501 Do we need to be honest all the time? Why or why not? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-03-12 2
106500 What holiday in another countries do you wish to also be... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-03-12 4063
106499 My day. ¾È*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-12 3
106498 Physical appearance ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-12 4168
106497 Why is English fluency significant for you? Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-12 4579
106496 2021.03.12 Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-12 3517
106495 HOMEWORK ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-12 3703
106494 Friday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-03-12 4492
106493 Write about your ideal spring vacation ¿À*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-12 5770
106492 The importance of salary in choosing a job °­*±¸ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-12 4843

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04