¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

The most boring job.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*ȯ
2021-03-16 3078

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

After doing military service, I could get a part-time job. At that time, my mother had worked a factory, she introduced me to the factory.
The factory has been producing some parts of car's Air conditioner. While I worked at the factory, I removed particles from a part what was cut by a machine for 8 hours every week days. It was so boring, I couldn't stand especially last time of every day. That period was winter season, while I was working I fired gas heater. After lunch, I dozed off. One day a manager said to me, "If you doze one more, You
fire." I couldn't doze anymore. While I was working at the factory, I realized that it isn't my job. I have to study hard to get my ideal job.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Kim Il Hwan,

  Thank you for taking time to answer this question. It only proves that you really wanted to improve in your English skill. Please do check and take note of the corrections for your improvement. I hope it helped you. 

Keep up the good work!


Sincerely,
Teacher Annie (^^)


After doing military service, I could get a part-time job. 
>>> After doing military service, I want to get a part-time job. 

At that time, my mother had worked a factory, she introduced me to the factory.
>>> At that time, my mother had worked in a factory, so she recommended me to work in the factory.

The factory has been producing some parts of car's Air conditioner. 
>>> The factory has been producing some parts of cars' air conditioner. 

While I worked at the factory, I removed particles from a part what was cut by a machine for 8 hours every week days. 
>>> My main job in the factory is to remove particles from a part that was cut by a machine for 8 hours every weekday. 

It was so boring, I couldn't stand especially last time of every day.
>>> It was so boring that I couldn't stand especially the last time of every day. 

That period was winter season, while I was working I fired gas heater. 
>>> That period was the winter season, while I was working I accidentally fired a gas heater. 

After lunch, I dozed off. One day a manager said to me, "If you doze one more, You fire." 
>>> After lunch, I dozed off. One day a manager said to me, "If you doze off one more, you fire." 

I couldn't doze anymore. While I was working at the factory, I realized that it isn't my job. 
>>> I couldn't afford to doze off anymore. While I was working at the factory, I realized that it isn't the job for me. 

I have to study hard to get my ideal job.
>>> CORRECT

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
106472 The history of a country is our existence and foundation. ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 4304
106471 ¿µÀÛ ¼÷Á¦ ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 0
106470 ¿µÀÛ ¼÷Á¦ ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 0
106469 homework ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 1
106468 If you can change something in your house, what would it be and... ÀÌ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 5261
106467 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 5114
106466 In the last 20 years, there have been significant developments... È«*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 2
106465 What is your favorite weather? why? ¼Û*·É ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 4234
106464 Do you think food is enough every Korean? Á¤*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 4507
106463 Homework °­*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 4939
106462 Homework °­*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 4453
106461 Homework °­*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 4701
106460 Homework °­*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 4382
106459 If you were born again,would you like to br a dog or cat. ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 4059
106458 If you are going to save up some money for something, what would... Çã*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 5
106457 Yes, I afraid of the great white shark. ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 5262
106456 question ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 4038
106455 What are the three most important things for you to be happy? Çã*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 5
106454 What do you want to do in your life? ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 1
106453 HOMEWORK ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-11 4535

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04