¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Can you tell a brief history of your hometown?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Á¤*¿ø
2021-03-21 3597

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

My hometown which is Damyang is famous for beautiful scenes of bamboo trees, peaceful farms, and malleable people. Thus many literary men were born in Damyang. Most poets used to discuss about political issues and share their opinion about their works.
There was a kind of school called SoSHeWon where was built in 1530 year in Joseon Dynasty. The walls are decorated with gorgeous hand writings by the greatest literary men who lived in that time. One of them, JungCheul who was an ancestor of my family cultivated many clever juniors at Soshewon from 1551 to 1561. It is still exist for visitors who want to feel the ancestor's emotions.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Happy Sunday to you Young Won!

It seems that you had an extensive research about your hometown to find out these details to place here on your composition. In many countries, one's roots is very important as it is where you trace your origin, culture, and tradition.

Now, you can tell these to your children for them to pass to their children too someday.

These details are more than enough for an IELTS answer. Thank you for always doing your best Yong Won.

See you tomorrow in class. Have a great night!

-T. Donna =)

My hometown which is Damyang is famous for beautiful scenes of bamboo trees, peaceful farms, and malleable people. 
>> Correct!

Thus many literary men were born in Damyang. 
>> Correct!

Most poets used to discuss about political issues and share their opinion about their works.
>> Correct!

There was a kind of school called SoSHeWon where was built in 1530 year in Joseon Dynasty. 
>> There is a kind of school called SoSHeWon that was built in the year 1530 in Joseon Dynasty. 

The walls are decorated with gorgeous hand writings by the greatest literary men who lived in that time. 
>> Correct!

One of them, JungCheul who was an ancestor of my family cultivated many clever juniors at Soshewon from 1551 to 1561. 
>> Correct!

It is still exist for visitors who want to feel the ancestor's emotions.
>> Correct!
Or: exists
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
106002 Will you keep up with the current events? ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-25 1330
106001 which country I would like to visit ±¸*È¿ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-25 1285
106000 homework ±è*ºñ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-25 1
105999 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-02-25 1410
105998 homework ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-25 1446
105997 Are you okay? Ysabelle? º¯*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-25 2
105996 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-25 1
105995 State of interest #8 Áø*±â ¿Ï·á 2021-02-25 1357
105994 State of interest #7 Áø*±â ¿Ï·á 2021-02-25 1688
105993 State of interest #6 Áø*±â ¿Ï·á 2021-02-25 1497
105992 State of interest #5 Áø*±â ¿Ï·á 2021-02-25 1
105991 What is something that you would have a hard time giving up and... ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-25 1
105990 English Homework 31 ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-02-25 1258
105989 Homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2021-02-24 3
105988 If you discovered that someone had been gossiping about you,... ±è*ÇØ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-24 1241
105987 The food makes me feel at home ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-02-24 1486
105986 Write about the worst movie you have seen. Ȳ*Á¶ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-24 1259
105985 What must a company do or have to be successful? ¼­*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-24 1839
105984 Homework (228) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-02-24 1296
105983 State of interest #4 Áø*±â ¿Ï·á 2021-02-24 1515

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04