¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What do you think life was like for human beings when dinosaurs were around?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*Á¶
2021-03-31 1111

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think that life of the human beings were cruelly hard. They have to be aware of predators. Also, they had to find foods to eat. Although they lived with other people, their life were still hard before basis civilization developed.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Here's your edited composition, Kai! Catch you next week!

Cheers, 
Jean~~



I think that life of the human beings were cruelly hard. 
>> I think that the life of human beings at that time was cruelly hard. 

They have to be aware of predators. 
>> They always had to be aware of predators and live on the edge. 

Also, they had to find foods to eat. 
>> correct

Although they lived with other people, their life were still hard before basis civilization developed.
>> Although they lived with other people, their life was still hard before the development of civilization. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
107758 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 1
107757 Lunar eclipse is~ ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 615
107756 What is on your bucket list? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 578
107755 Writing Sample Á¶*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 664
107754 Wednesday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 597
107753 Summer vacation. ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 2
107752 Is it healthy to eat eggs everyday? ½Å*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 546
107751 What can you say about requiring all women to attend the... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 694
107750 homework ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 722
107749 Would you rather celebrate your birthday with just your... ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 1
107748 Which is more important, acting or special effects? Why? ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 1
107747 SMILE ANSWER º¯*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 582
107746 Write about some common lunch boxes or Doshira in your city. ¿À*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 769
107745 What do you usually do when you are facing a really big problem? ¹Ú*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 668
107744 Homework📓 ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 598
107743 \"No one realizes how beautiful it is to travel until he comes... ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 656
107742 SK Telecom introduces 5G-based disinfection robot at local... À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 2
107741 What are the things that you always put on your table? ½Å*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 660
107740 Hi Àü*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 620
107739 homework ¾È*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 4

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04