¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think Arts have something to do with one\'s behavior?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*±¹
2021-04-03 716

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think that Arts express one's emotion. There is various methods to care people's mind. Expressive arts therapy uses arts like movements, drawing, painting, wrings, sound, It is process of discovering ourselves from inner emotion. Peoples use the arts to let go, to express, to release.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Sir Mandeep! Thank you for taking time in answering the question. Here are some of the corrections, but other than that, you did really great. :) Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

I think that Arts express one's emotion.
>> CORRECT!

There is various methods to care people's mind.
>> There are various methods to care people's mind.

Expressive arts therapy uses arts like movements, drawing, painting, wrings, sound, 
>>Expressive arts therapy uses arts like movements, drawings, paintings, wrings, and sounds.

It is process of discovering ourselves from inner emotion. 
>> It is a process of discovering ourselves from inner emotion. 

Peoples use the arts to let go, to express, to release.
>> People use the arts to let go, to express, and to release.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
106995 Sorry. I sent it a lot late. º¯*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-29 1675
106994 How do you keep yourself updated? ÇÏ*Á¶ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-29 2594
106993 How do you manage your stress? ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-29 2024
106992 How can the public transportation in your city be improved? ÀÌ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-29 1236
106991 What are the important things to remember during an emergency... ±Ç*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-03-29 2135
106990 What will you do if you didn\'t do your purpose on a business... ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-28 1426
106989 Homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2021-03-28 5
106988 I hate using computers. ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-28 2216
106987 Should there be a limit on how many children there should be in... ±è*¿­ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-28 1632
106986 Should there be a limit on how many children there should be in... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-03-28 0
106985 How can the public transportation in your city be improved? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-03-28 0
106984 Would you like to recommend a cosmetic brand to me? What is it? ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-28 3
106983 Should there be a limit on how many children there should be in... Çã*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2021-03-28 1
106982 How can the public transportation in your city be improved? Çã*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2021-03-28 1
106981 In the past, most people used to travel to their place of work.... Á¤*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-03-28 3028
106980 Lilac ( IU) ¾È*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-28 6
106979 What do you like to do on the weekend? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-28 1591
106978 My favorite holiday ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-28 1
106977 White supremacy and hate are haunting Asian Americans À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-03-28 1
106976 By the end of the century, summer weather could last half a year... À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-03-28 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04