¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think Arts have something to do with one\'s behavior?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*±¹
2021-04-03 719

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think that Arts express one's emotion. There is various methods to care people's mind. Expressive arts therapy uses arts like movements, drawing, painting, wrings, sound, It is process of discovering ourselves from inner emotion. Peoples use the arts to let go, to express, to release.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Sir Mandeep! Thank you for taking time in answering the question. Here are some of the corrections, but other than that, you did really great. :) Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

I think that Arts express one's emotion.
>> CORRECT!

There is various methods to care people's mind.
>> There are various methods to care people's mind.

Expressive arts therapy uses arts like movements, drawing, painting, wrings, sound, 
>>Expressive arts therapy uses arts like movements, drawings, paintings, wrings, and sounds.

It is process of discovering ourselves from inner emotion. 
>> It is a process of discovering ourselves from inner emotion. 

Peoples use the arts to let go, to express, to release.
>> People use the arts to let go, to express, and to release.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
106962 HOMEWORK ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-26 2472
106961 What is your favorite movie? Why? ¼Û*·É ¿Ï·á 2021-03-26 2705
106960 Friday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-03-26 2979
106959 What body language offends you? ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-26 2307
106958 When a person spends most of his or her time working a job with... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-26 2761
106957 What is your favorite song and why? ¼Û*·É ¿Ï·á 2021-03-26 2500
106956 Homework ÀÌ*¶÷ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-26 2
106955 What are indirect questions? ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-26 2246
106954 What do you want to include in your ideal fitness program? ½Å*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-03-26 1647
106953 Homework ÀÌ*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-26 2113
106952 cover letter ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-26 4
106951 cover letter ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-26 1
106950 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-26 2
106949 How often do you wash your hands with soap? ±è*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-26 1762
106948 Do you prefer baths or showers? ±è*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-26 1777
106947 alternatives of zoos Á¤*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-03-26 1552
106946 Composition º¯*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-26 1
106945 homework ±Ç*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-03-26 2215
106944 Composition º¯*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-25 2
106943 Homework (249) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-03-25 2900

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04