¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Some people believe that individuals are becoming more and more dependent on each other, where as ot

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2021-06-14 298

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think that people are becoming more dependent but they feel lonely. The family have became smaller than before and there are more people who are not planning to get married. Many people prefer to live alone because they don't want to be bothered by children and a partner. So, people have learnt cooking, cleaning and doing laundry by themselves. This is positive aspects because they can do anything without parents. However, there are a lot of free time and they don't know what they have to do, especially on weekends. Although, there are a lot of online clubs which are gathered the same interests, we can't enjoy it fully when we have joined there because members in the clubs are not their family and friends who have been known for a long time. I guess that human would like to have close people such as family ultimately.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there Mr. Hwang~! ^^ It's so gloomy here. I have blues now. Anyway, I'm still awesome! Hahaha! How's your day going? Tell me tomorrow! :D See you!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
I think that people are becoming more independent but they feel lonely. 
>>> CORRECT
The family have became smaller than before and there are more people who are not planning to get married.
>>> CORRECT
Many people prefer to live alone because they don't want to be bothered by children and their partner.
>>> CORRECT
 So, people have learnt cooking, cleaning and doing laundry by themselves.
>>> CORRECT
 This is positive aspects because they can do anything without parents.
>>>  These are positive aspects because they can do anything without their parents.
 However, there are a lot of free time and they don't know what they have to do, especially on weekends. 
>>> CORRECT
Although, there are a lot of online clubs which are gathered the same interests, we can't enjoy it fully when we have joined there because members in the clubs are not their family and friends who have been known for a long time.
>>> Although, there are a lot of online clubs which gather the same interests. We can't enjoy it fully when we join on it because members in the clubs are not family members and friends who they have known for a long time.
 I guess that human would like to have close people such as family ultimately.
>>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
109470 Task ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-18 322
109469 What is a mistake that you would want to repeat? ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-18 298
109468 HW ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-06-18 277
109467 What would you like to know about your country? ÇÏ*Á¶ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-18 267
109466 Are you currently raising a pet? If not, have you ever thought... ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 283
109465 homework ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 3
109464 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 299
109463 HOMEWORK ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 290
109462 The most livable in my country ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 1
109461 Fill in the blanks ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 278
109460 Homework Ç¥*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 4
109459 I want to be a cat! Among the small ones. ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 254
109458 What Korean policy/law do you think should be removed? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 299
109457 What do you consider in buying a house or apartment? ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 267
109456 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 275
109455 What do you need to do, so you could do a half day at work? ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 301
109454 HW ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 0
109453 What Korean policy/law do you think should be removed? ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 286
109452 Do you want to work on weekends? Why or why not? ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 340
109451 Do you think it is important to wear fashionable clothes? Why or... ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04