¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What country do you want to visit and why?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*¿µ
2021-07-06 328

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I want to visit England because I love England movie and drama such as Harry Potter and Sherlock Holmes. If I visit the country, I want to go to movie and drama set. The most reason why I want to go England is that I hope to go to college major in accounting and finance. England is famous for accounting and finance. Therefore, I'm going to be an international accountant working in UK.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Yeong! ^^

That's actually a good choice. Europe is known for many great sceneries. The reasons for traveling to Europe are endless. As if its history, culture and natural beauty are not enough to draw you; the cuisine, the locals and the myriad of sights and wonders to see would be more than enough to suffice many visitors. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

I want to visit England because I love England movie and drama such as Harry Potter and Sherlock Holmes. 
>> I want to visit England because I love the movies and dramas from that country such Harry Potter and Sherlock Holmes.

If I visit the country, I want to go to movie and drama set. 
>> If I visit the country, I want to go to a movie and drama set. 

The most reason why I want to go England is that I hope to go to college major in accounting and finance. 
>> The main reason why I want to go there is because I hope to study accountancy and financing in their colleges. 

England is famous for accounting and finance. 
>> CORRECT

Therefore, I'm going to be an international accountant working in UK.
>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
109863 Are you a busy man? ÇÏ*Á¶ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-07 285
109862 What country do you want to visit and why? ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 328
109861 What country would you like to visit and why? ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 366
109860 home work ÃÖ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 2
109859 Homework ¹é*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 11
109858 Trust ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 404
109857 Have a good day Queeny! ¿À*¸° ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 386
109856 What is the first thing that you always do when you visit a new... ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 321
109855 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 363
109854 Do I like small talk? ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 411
109853 HOMEWORK ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 358
109852 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 1
109851 Give me one festival in your hometown that you enjoy the most. ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 331
109850 What are the advantages and disadvantages of working with a... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 2
109849 My favorite sweets treats are Twix, and ABC chocolate. ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 443
109848 What do you like most about Korea? ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 335
109847 Fill in the blanks ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 353
109846 Homework ½É*»ó ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 409
109845 What is the first thing that you always do when you visit a new... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 397
109844 What is the first thing that you always do when you visit a new... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04