¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹é*Çö
2021-07-28 220

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Different country work is better Korea work.
Because, Korea work is very hard.
hard reason is Various.
First In the old days many people did night overtime.
Nowadays, young people don't do night overtime. because young people want work life balance.
but, past generation people don't understand. because past generation life is work.
Second, Korea work office exist sex discrimination.
Men have higher positions women. reason is just man.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Hyeon! ^^

There are many reasons why working abroad will benefit both yourself personally, and your career. Two of the most obvious (yet still important) are: Better career opportunities and prospects: Depending on your skill set, there may be a greater range of career opportunities open to you outside your home market.

We have different reasons why we want to work in other countries. Some people prefer working in their home countries as well. Either way, it still depends on what suits you and your family depending on your needs as well. :) 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

Different country work is better Korea work.
>> Working in a different country is better than working here in Korea. 

Because, Korea work is very hard.
>> It's because working here is hard. 

hard reason is Various.
>> It is hard in various reasons. 

First In the old days many people did night overtime.
>> Back then, people used to work over time. 

Nowadays, young people don't do night overtime. because young people want work life balance.
>> Nowadays, young people don't do that anymore and has work and life balance already. 

but, past generation people don't understand. because past generation life is work.
>> But older people don't understand how they do it. 

Second, Korea work office exist sex discrimination.
>> Another reason is that there is gender discrimination when you work in offices here. 

Men have higher positions women. reason is just man.
>> Men have higher positions women.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
110235 How do you stop hiccups? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-07-22 0
110234 Do you think that endangered species should be kept in captive... ÇÏ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-22 152
110233 home work on July 22 ÃÖ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-07-22 1
110232 Cut ties ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-22 3
110231 A good education! ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-22 165
110230 HOMEWORK ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-22 304
110229 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-22 1
110228 Fill in the blanks ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-22 200
110227 Are you a spender or a saver of money? Why? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-22 200
110226 Do you think that endangered species should be kept in captive... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-22 2
110225 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-07-22 161
110224 Homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-07-22 2
110223 What kind of games or toys did you play when you were young? Do... ±è*¼ø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-22 173
110222 My homework Àü*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-22 172
110221 Page 44 ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-07-22 144
110220 Homework ¾ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-22 159
110219 Have / If S had pp, ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-22 156
110218 HOMEWORK: ESSAY: Do you think smoking areas should be totally... ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-22 331
110217 Homework 7.22 Àå*º° ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 203
110216 When is exercising too much? ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04