¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹é*Çö
2021-07-28 218

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Different country work is better Korea work.
Because, Korea work is very hard.
hard reason is Various.
First In the old days many people did night overtime.
Nowadays, young people don't do night overtime. because young people want work life balance.
but, past generation people don't understand. because past generation life is work.
Second, Korea work office exist sex discrimination.
Men have higher positions women. reason is just man.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Hyeon! ^^

There are many reasons why working abroad will benefit both yourself personally, and your career. Two of the most obvious (yet still important) are: Better career opportunities and prospects: Depending on your skill set, there may be a greater range of career opportunities open to you outside your home market.

We have different reasons why we want to work in other countries. Some people prefer working in their home countries as well. Either way, it still depends on what suits you and your family depending on your needs as well. :) 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

Different country work is better Korea work.
>> Working in a different country is better than working here in Korea. 

Because, Korea work is very hard.
>> It's because working here is hard. 

hard reason is Various.
>> It is hard in various reasons. 

First In the old days many people did night overtime.
>> Back then, people used to work over time. 

Nowadays, young people don't do night overtime. because young people want work life balance.
>> Nowadays, young people don't do that anymore and has work and life balance already. 

but, past generation people don't understand. because past generation life is work.
>> But older people don't understand how they do it. 

Second, Korea work office exist sex discrimination.
>> Another reason is that there is gender discrimination when you work in offices here. 

Men have higher positions women. reason is just man.
>> Men have higher positions women.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
110215 How do you give or show thanks to your parents? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 0
110214 How can you describe your family in your own words? ÇÏ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 142
110213 Are you a spender or a saver? ÇÏ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 155
110212 If you were an American, what do you think you could have been... ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 0
110211 Homework (310) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 135
110210 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 753
110209 Hi Kate! ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 4
110208 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 0
110207 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 195
110206 Fill in the blanks ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 166
110205 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 1
110204 Internet, and Youtube ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 169
110203 homework ¹é*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 134
110202 A caffeine ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 3
110201 Being parents ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 140
110200 Page 39 ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 224
110199 Monday homework ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 139
110198 Homework📝 ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 135
110197 How do you control your anger? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 2
110196 The reason why °­*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 184

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04