¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What do you think should the government about the homeless people on the streets?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹Ú*ÁÖ
2021-08-08 450

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

What do you think should the government about the homeless people on the streets?

Government helps the homeless people on the streets.
At present, government is supported the homeless.
Government is provided shelter and work to the homeless for geting back on their feet.
But, most of the homeless is still lived on the streets.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Monica! ^^

There¡¯s never a good time to lack shelter, but the return of cold weather presents particular challenges for people experiencing homelessness. The sight of someone on the street in fall and winter compels us to make an effort to help. But it can be difficult to know how to make the greatest impact. Your suggestion is great!

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

Government helps the homeless people on the streets.
>> The government should help the homeless people on the street. 

At present, government is supported the homeless.
>> As of now, the government is already doing it. 

Government is provided shelter and work to the homeless for geting back on their feet.
>> They have provided shelter and work for the homeless for them to get back on their feet. 

But, most of the homeless is still lived on the streets.
>> But, most of the homeless still live on the streets.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
111183 Tuesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 329
111182 Homework Àü*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 241
111181 Nowadays employment options are changing and employees cannot... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 267
111180 If you were a medical student during the time of the pandemic,... Á¤*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 265
111179 17th homewokr Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 3
111178 Homework °­*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 2
111177 Writing task: What are the best ways to make a good first... Á¶*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 2
111176 Things for School ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 304
111175 e-mail correction ¹Ú*±¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 3
111174 Do you think you will live until a ripe old age? Why or why not? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 0
111173 Homework À±*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 336
111172 Homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 8
111171 21/08/24 ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 289
111170 Korea to consider animals not things À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 2
111169 In your opinion, what are the pros and cons of studying at home? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 0
111168 The Changeable Trend In Real Estate Brokerage È«*Çý ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 305
111167 How do you imagine your country\'s healthcare ranks compared to... ±è*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 506
111166 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 1
111165 Homework ¾ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 0
111164 In your opinion, what are the pros and cons of studying at home? ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-08-24 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04