¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Who, besides your parents, had the biggest impact on your childhood?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2021-09-07 267

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think my brother gave me the biggest impact on my chilhood besides my parents.
I was able to grow my social ability more faster and I think I had a lot of great time with my brother.
I learned how to thank to other people and how to apolosize to other people.
That's why I think my brother gave me the biggest impact on my chilhood besides my parents.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John! ^^
 
There are certain people in our lives that has made a great impact in our lives. Most of them come from our childhood. We wouldn't be who we are today without their help. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

I think my brother gave me the biggest impact on my chilhood besides my parents.
>>I think my brother has the biggest impact on my childhood besides my parents.

I was able to grow my social ability more faster and I think I had a lot of great time with my brother.
>> I was able to grow my social skills faster and I think I had a lot of great time with my brother.

I learned how to thank to other people and how to apolosize to other people.
>> I learned how to thank other people and how to apologize as well. 

That's why I think my brother gave me the biggest impact on my chilhood besides my parents.
>> That's why I think my brother had the biggest impact on my childhood besides my parents.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
110523 What should you never miss putting your bag? ÇÏ*Á¶ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-04 321
110522 Using Internet charge Á¤*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-04 217
110521 What is one policy for women in Korea that you appreciate? ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-03 2
110520 What do you think is the most important subject? Explain your... ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-03 223
110519 homework : do you think it is better to give time or money? ±è*Çý ¿Ï·á 2021-08-03 264
110518 HOMEWORK ±Ç*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-03 214
110517 ¼÷Á¦ ±è*ºñ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-03 250
110516 What is in your bucket list? ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-03 1
110515 Do you think it\'s necessary to move out of your parents house... ÇÏ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-03 218
110514 a killing time ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-03 3
110513 What is the most difficult decision that you have had to make? ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-08-03 162
110512 How would your friends describe you? ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-08-03 292
110511 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-03 206
110510 My Homework(Should I wright my homework here...?) °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-03 309
110509 What Is The First Thing You¡¯ll Do Once Corona-19 Is Gone? È«*Çý ¿Ï·á 2021-08-03 7
110508 Olympic ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-03 820
110507 21/08/03 homework ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-08-03 162
110506 HOMEWORK ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-03 224
110505 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-03 239
110504 I think dogs are more loyal. ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-08-03 209

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04