¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Crimes

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Á¤
2021-09-30 387

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

1. What is the worst crime in your opinion? Is it prevalent in your country?

In my opinion, Vicious crimes to the weak is worst. I mean the crimes Against eldery, women, and even innocent children and animals. For example, there was a crime that teenaged grandsons murder their old grandmother stabbing with a knife many times. Even though she had raised the grandsons without their parents, they killed her because she had scolded them. Not same cases, but these kinds of crimes against the weak are increasing and getting crueler. So nowadays I don't feel like reading news articles anymore.. ;(

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good evening, Yu Jeong! 

Thank you for answering the Composition question! :) Here's my comment for your answer :) 

Question: What is the worst crime in your opinion? Is it prevalent in your country?

Your answer: In my opinion, Vicious crimes to the weak is worst. I mean the crimes Against eldery, women, and even innocent children and animals. For example, there was a crime that teenaged grandsons murder their old grandmother stabbing with a knife many times. Even though she had raised the grandsons without their parents, they killed her because she had scolded them. Not same cases, but these kinds of crimes against the weak are increasing and getting crueler. So nowadays I don't feel like reading news articles anymore.. ;(

>> In my opinion, vicious crimes against the weak is the worst. For example, crimes against elderly, women, and even innocent children and animals. For example, there was a crime where teenage grandsons murdered their old grandmother by  stabbing her with a knife for a couple of times. Even though she was the one who raised her grandsons because the parents were not there, they still killed her simply because she scolded them. Crimes like these are increasing and getting more violent, so that's why I don't feel like reading news articles anymore. 

-------------

Thank you for sharing this with me! I agree with you that it is disheartening to hear about news like these. :( We should find a way how to stop these vicious crimes so that we can have a more hopeful society. :) 


See you later in class! 

~Miya^^
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
110892 Daily Coronavirus Infectoins Surpass 2000 À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-08-16 2
110891 What do you like/hate most about school reunions? ÇÏ*Á¶ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-16 378
110890 Are you comfortable wearing a dress? ¼Û*¾È ¿Ï·á 2021-08-16 0
110889 Covid-19 ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-15 2
110888 HOMEWORK ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-15 361
110887 Home work ±è*È¿ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-15 497
110886 Homework ±è*È¿ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-15 434
110885 Homework ±è*È¿ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-15 476
110884 Tradition ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-15 1
110883 If it was your birthday, what gift do you want to receive and... ÇÏ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-15 396
110882 Name three countries you will never visit and why? ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-15 478
110881 Page 34 ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-08-14 341
110880 Does color affect your emotions? ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-14 491
110879 If it was your birthday, what gift do you want to receive and... ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-08-14 2
110878 homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-08-14 514
110877 Have you ever had a job interview before? ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-13 3
110876 Tell me something about your memorable experience at our school. ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-08-13 384
110875 What is your philosophy in life? - interview answer ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-08-13 395
110874 What is one thing you\'ve never done but would like to do? È«*Çý ¿Ï·á 2021-08-13 5
110873 Do you think going to different academies is important for... ÇÏ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-13 408

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04