¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

why the cellphone is important

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¼º
2021-10-01 223

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

The cellphone is very important.
That is because when we don't have a cellphone, we can't to call for far people.
My second reason is we can't listen a music and listen music is very important from people.
My third reason is we can't to have information easily when we don't have cellphone
Finally, we can use cellphone to many things.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

The cellphone is very important.
>> Cellphones are very important. 

That is because when we don't have a cellphone, we can't to call for far people.
>> That is because when we don't have a cellphone, we can't call the people who live far from us.

My second reason is we can't listen a music and listen music is very important from people.
>> The second reason is that 
we can't listen to music without it, and listening to music is very important for people.

My third reason is we can't to have information easily when we don't have cellphone
>> The third reason is that we can't easily get information when we don't have one.

Finally, we can use cellphone to many things.
>> Finally, we can use cellphones for many things. 



Hi, Joey! Your reply is the perfect answer to the given question. Good job! However, please focus on the proper use of articles and prepositions.  
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
112431 Crimes 2 ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-01 297
112430 Magical Adventure Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-10-01 242
112429 why the cellphone is important ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-10-01 223
112428 HOMEWORK ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-01 241
112427 How different is North Korea from South Korea nowadays? Explain... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-01 238
112426 Homework °­*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-10-01 4
112425 Homework °­*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-10-01 4
112424 my dislike subject ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-10-01 234
112423 At what age do people usually begin to work in your country? ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-01 1
112422 Friday homeowrk ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-01 207
112421 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-01 2
112420 Homework À±*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-01 233
112419 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-10-01 402
112418 Is there anything that does not yet exist that you would like to... ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-01 1
112417 My homework Àü*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-10-01 210
112416 Movies and computer games containing violence are popular. Some... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-01 258
112415 HOMEWORK ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-01 238
112414 Howework ±Ç*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-10-01 2
112413 How different is North Korea from South Korea nowadays? Explain... ±è*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-01 238
112412 Today\'s homework Ȳ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-01 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04