¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What are your fears and how are you going to overcome them?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2021-10-14 589

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I had a lot of fears when I was younger than now.
And it was just about small things like a fear about monster or somethings like that.
But now, I don't have those kinds of fears.
Just I have a little fear about some insects or bees.
Now I am thinking that I was so strange because I just had a fear about monsters.
So I thought that those of fears are just useless things in my life.
But I recognized that we can grow with those fears.
If I don't had any fears, than I think I was not able to be me.
So I had those kinds of fears when I was young, and I think fears are very neccessary things in my life.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John :)

Fear and anxiety can last for a short time and then pass, but they can also last much longer and you can get stuck with them. In some cases they can take over your life, affecting your ability to eat, sleep, concentrate, travel, enjoy life, or even leave the house or go to work or school. This can hold you back from doing things you want or need to do, and it also affects your health.

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

I had a lot of fears when I was younger than now.
>> I had a lot of fears when I was younger. 

And it was just about small things like a fear about monster or somethings like that.
>> Most of them are small things like fear of monsters. Something like that. 

But now, I don't have those kinds of fears.
>> CORRECT

Just I have a little fear about some insects or bees.
>> Just I have a little fear for insects. 

Now I am thinking that I was so strange because I just had a fear about monsters.
>> Now that I am thinking about it, I feel silly because I had a fear for monsters. 

So I thought that those of fears are just useless things in my life.
>> So I thought, those fears are useless. 

But I recognized that we can grow with those fears.
>> I recognize now that we can grow with our fears. 

If I don't had any fears, than I think I was not able to be me.
>> If I didn't have any fears before, I wouldn't be the person that I am today. 

So I had those kinds of fears when I was young, and I think fears are very neccessary things in my life.
>> So the fears that I had in my life before are necessary for the life that I have right now. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
112503 What kind of business do you think would be successful during... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 0
112502 Homework ÀÌ*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 390
112501 HOMEWORK ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 314
112500 10.4 ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 2
112499 ¼÷Á¦ Á¤*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 654
112498 What souvenir from other countries do you bring back to Korea? ÀÌ*¶÷ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 2
112497 I will make more coll paper-build robot!! ¿À*°á ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 384
112496 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 0
112495 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 306
112494 Homework °­*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 3
112493 Homework °­*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 3
112492 If i could be reincarnated.. ¹Ú*Çù ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 317
112491 Fill in the blanks ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 972
112490 What are the benefits of aging? ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 390
112489 Do you believe that there is still a chance for South Korea and... ¼±* ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 1094
112488 Homework À±*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 654
112487 If you can be reincarnated, what kind of life would you want on... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 383
112486 How has technology changed the society? ¼±* ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 347
112485 Are these sentences grammatically correct? °­*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 423
112484 Monday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 318

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04