¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Protecting animal=protecting environment

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2021-10-15 514

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Protecting animals means protecting environment. If we protect environment, animals can live better. I'll cite three ways how to protect environment.
First, we must not throw away trash to the environment. It can protect environment from pollution.
Second, we should not drive car too much. Driving car too much can cause air pollution.
Third, we should grow lots of trees. Trees can take in harmful air.
Frankly, there are a lot of ways to protect environment(animals). But these three ways are very important things to protect environment, so we should follow these at least.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Daniel!  Your work is comprehensible and well-structured.  Please don't forget to put the article THE before the word ENVIRONMENT though. 

- Teacher Debbie


 Protecting animals means protecting environment.
>> Protecting animals means protecting the environment.

If we protect environment, animals can live better.
>> If we protect the environment, animals can live better.

I'll cite three ways how to protect environment.
>> I'll cite three ways how to protect the environment.

First, we must not throw away trash to the environment.
>> First, we must not throw away trash anywhere.

 It can protect environment from pollution.
>> It can protect the environment from pollution.

Second, we should not drive car too much. 
>> Second, we should not drive cars too much. 

Driving car too much can cause air pollution.
>> Driving cars too much can cause air pollution.

Third, we should grow lots of trees.
>> This is a good sentence.

 Trees can take in harmful air.
>> This is a good sentence.

Frankly, there are a lot of ways to protect environment(animals).
>> Frankly, there are a lot of ways to protect the environment and the animals.

 But these three ways are very important things to protect environment, so we should follow these at least.
>> However, these three ways are the most important to protect the environment, so we should follow them at least.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
114515 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-07 2
114514 What are the things that make you laugh easily? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2021-12-07 705
114513 When did you last have an interview? ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-07 2
114512 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-07 1
114511 Why is greeting important? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2021-12-07 1
114510 Funeral Sermon 1 ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-12-07 612
114509 Funeral Sermon 2 ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-12-07 502
114508 Funeral Sermon 1 ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-12-07 338
114507 Why is English fluency significant for you? ±Ý*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-07 718
114506 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-07 2445
114505 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-07 410
114504 12/3 , 12/6 ³ë*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-07 878
114503 What is more important to take care of : mental health or... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-07 450
114502 Why do adults collect children\'s stuff like hello kitty or some... ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-07 444
114501 What do you like to shop for the most? ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-12-07 0
114500 Sometimes:) ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-07 392
114499 How would you describe a healthy diet? À±*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-07 2
114498 12.06 homework ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-12-06 0
114497 I like him!!! ¿À*°á ¿Ï·á 2021-12-06 504
114496 essay about\"If you could be invisible for a day what would you... ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-06 339

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04