¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Some people think parents are responsible for transporting their children to school. Others think it

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2021-11-23 381

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I used to go to school alone by walk everyday. I didn't ask my parents to take me to the school, even I was junior in elementary school. It was normal for children to go to school alone or with their friends because most households didn't have their car and it was not dangerous. Actually, parents couldn't afford to take care of their children well like modern society because our country was really poor, most parents worked together. However, environment around children has changed a lot compare to 1980s. There have been a lot crime in this world, especially kidnap, school bully and children violence by teacher. Parents don't want their children to become potential victims so parents transport them to school even if it takes time in early morning. In fact, most people need to go to work early morning that is almost impossible for them to care their children. If government provide pick up service, I am willing to use it. I don't know how much budget our government need but I guess it is

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there Mr. Hwang! ^^ Push yourself, because no one else is going to do it for you. ^^ Keep learning! 
>>> TEACHER GEMMA 
I used to go to school alone by walk everyday. 
>>> I used to go to school alone on foot every day. 
I didn't ask my parents to take me to school, even if I was a junior in elementary school.
>>> CORRECT
 It was normal for children to go to school alone or with their friends because most households didn't have their car and it was not dangerous. 
>>> CORRECT
Actually, parents couldn't afford to take care of their children well like the modern society because our country was really poor, most parents worked together.
>>> CORRECT
 However, environment around children has changed a lot compare to 1980s.
>>>  However, the environment around children has changed a lot compared to the year 1980s.
 There have been a lot crime in this world, especially kidnap, school bully and children violence by teacher. 
>>>  There have been a lot of crime in this world, especially abduction, school bullying and children's violence to the teacher. 
Parents don't want their children to become potential victims so parents transport them to school even if it takes early morning. 
>>> CORRECT
In fact, most people need to go to work early morning that is almost impossible for them to care their children. 
>>> CORRECT
If government provide pick up service, I am willing to use it.
>>> If the government provides a pick-up service, I am willing to avail it.
 I don't know how much budget our government needs but I guess it is...
>>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
113321 Please correct the sentence I made À±*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-10-27 372
113320 6 ä*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-27 423
113319 Homework: Write about the most famous places in your city. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-10-27 354
113318 What is something that always makes you angry? Kindly explain. ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-27 525
113317 What is something that always makes you angry? Kindly explain. ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-10-27 0
113316 Wednesday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-27 430
113315 Homework À±*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-27 341
113314 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-27 377
113313 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-10-27 415
113312 To send confidential information À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-10-27 395
113311 Describe the first memory you have of going to school. ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-27 0
113310 Journal ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-10-27 311
113309 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-27 1
113308 My son very sick, we go to hospital, sorry fiona see you 2weeks... ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-10-27 406
113307 Today\'s homework Ȳ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-27 1
113306 Is American English better than any other English? Why? Answer... ±è*¹¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-27 421
113305 homework ³²*¸¸ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-27 688
113304 Would you describe your workplace as formal or casual? ¹Ú*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-10-27 3
113303 What is the importance of being part of an organization? ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-27 1
113302 Tell me about your last vacation. ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-10-27 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04