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How would life be without music?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¾ç*Àº
2021-12-08 180

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think that music is a kind of painting.
Because it make a life colorful and diverse.
Then our life would be simple not diverse without music.
And diversity is one of most important factors of creativity.
In short, our life is going to be not creative without music.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Ian!  Thank you for doing your homework. Your sentence construction is getting better. Great!

- Debbie

I think that music is a kind of painting.
>> I think music is a kind of painting.

Because it make a life colorful and diverse.
>> It is because it makes our lives colorful and diverse.

Then our life would be simple not diverse without music.
>> Hence, our lives would be simple without music.

And diversity is one of most important factors of creativity.
>> Diversity is one of the most important factors of creativity.

In short, our life is going to be not creative without music.
>> In short, we would not be creative without music.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
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