¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Many jobs require ongoing training and research to stay competitive in a world with rapidly evolving

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2021-12-14 441

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I strongly believe that continues education improve our skill and it provides a chance to update our knowledge. It is true that many companies have asked people to do research and get training to be competitive. Although, I am pros of self-development, there are too many adverse effect. Firstly, people have just tried to acquire certification through online or offline classes. They don't usually put their attention while they are having a class because their final goal is to get a result. Secondly, people can be suffering from the stress to be the best in too competitive environment. Everything has changed quickly in modern society therefore if people don't develop themselves, they will be one of the looser that might be resulted on serious health problem. Some people feel like commit a suicide due to competition. Lastly, people might study unnecessary subjects which are not related with their major or job. In conclusion, It;s worth to improve people's skill if company don't pus

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there! It's quite a tiring day today! I hope you're having a good one. 
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
I strongly believe that continues education improve our skills and it provides a chance to update our knowledge.
>>> I strongly believe that continues education improve our skills and it provides a chance to upgrade our knowledge.
 It is true that many companies have asked people to do research and get training to be competitive. 
>>> CORRECT
Although, I am pros of self-development, there are too many adverse effect. 
>>> Although, I am positive of self-development, there are too many adverse effects. 
Firstly, people have just tried to acquire certification through online or offline classes. 
>>> CORRECT
They don't usually put their attention while they are having a class because their final goal is to get a result. 
>>> They don't usually pay attention while they are having a class because their final goal is to get a result. 
Secondly, people can be suffering from the stress to be the best in too competitive environment.
>>> Secondly, people can be suffering from stress to be the best in a too competitive environment.
 Everything has changed quickly in modern society therefore if people don't develop themselves, they will be one of the looser that might be resulted on serious health problem. 
>>>  Everything has changed quickly in the modern society therefore if people don't develop themselves, they will be one of the looser that might be resulted in a serious health problem. 
Some people feel like commit a suicide due to competition. 
>>> Some people feel like committing a suicide due to the competition. 
Lastly, people might study unnecessary subjects which are not related with their major or job. 
>>> CORRECT
In conclusion, it's worth to improve people's skill if the company doesn't...
>>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
112722 Do you consider yourself a creative person? Why? ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-10-10 523
112721 Why king Sejong invented Hangul? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-10 2
112720 How do you maintain your good skills? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2021-10-10 1
112719 Do you think that the news is necessary? Why or why not? ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-10 5
112718 Walking ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-10 2
112717 Colors ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-10 2
112716 10.08 homework ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-10-10 2
112715 Homework ¹æ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-10 452
112714 writing homework ¾È*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-10-10 507
112713 What will you do if you don¡¯t get this job? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-10-09 396
112712 The clear instruction to someone À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-10-09 766
112711 What are the things you\'re going to do when you retire? ÇÏ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-10-09 443
112710 Which amongst all the advice of Donald Trump can you live by... ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-10-08 1
112709 What part of your body or face is your favorite? ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-08 455
112708 What is good about renting something? ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-08 510
112707 How to greet in Korea. ¾ç*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-10-08 1159
112706 Who do you think is the best candidate for president in the next... ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-10-08 532
112705 Stone is necessary ingredient. ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-08 426
112704 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-10-08 470
112703 HOMEWORK: How do you overcome your fears? ¼Õ*Çü ¿Ï·á 2021-10-08 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04