¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

According to my experience....

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2022-01-06 1150

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

In my case, first way is putting the earphones and listened to 'Faded'. It's one of the most famous pop songs, but it brings me peace to me. According to my experience(?), in very loud place I can't listen to musics like classic. In the case of Faded, it is proper loud, but it brings me peace. I think this song makes me in the stopped time. I recommend this song to you when you want to in the stopped time in the loud place. Second way is thinking and feeling the happiest moment in your life. And close your eyes. When I do it, I think I'm in stopped time, too. In addition, I can raise self-esteem, and think me that I have lots of good memories. It is just based on my experience, so finding your own way is better thing.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Daniel! Thank you for answering your homework. Please take note of the corrections.


- Teacher Debbie

Homework:  How do you find peace and quiet in a loud area?

According to my experience(?), in very loud place I can't listen to musics like classic. 
>> In my experience, I couldn't listen loudly to music, like classical music, when I was in a noisy place.  

In my case, first way is putting the earphones and listened to 'Faded'. 
>> Therefore, when I'm in a loud place, first, I wear my earphones and listen to "Faded."

It's one of the most famous pop songs, but it brings me peace to me.
>> It's one of the most famous pop songs, but it brings me peace.

In the case of Faded, it is proper loud, but it brings me peace. 
>> It is quite loud, but it calms me.

I think this song makes me in the stopped time.
>> I think this song freezes time.

 I recommend this song to you when you want to in the stopped time in the loud place. 
>>  I recommend you listen to this song when you want to freeze time while in a loud place.

Second way is thinking and feeling the happiest moment in your life. And close your eyes. 
>> Second, I think about the happiest moment in my life and close my eyes.

When I do it, I think I'm in stopped time, too. 
>> When I do these, I think time stops, too.

In addition, I can raise self-esteem, and think me that I have lots of good memories.
>> In addition, I feel more confident whenever I think of lots of good memories.

It is just based on my experience, so finding your own way is better thing.
>> These are based on my experience, so finding your own way to find peace and quiet is better.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
115211 What do you usually wish for during your birthday? ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-04 162
115210 What makes an advertisement memorable? ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-01-04 0
115209 Do you think overpopulation is an important environmental issue? ¾ç*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-01-04 1
115208 What are you looking forward to the most this new year? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-04 2
115207 What are the beautiful places that you have visited in Korea? ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-01-03 135
115206 What kind of cause or charity organizations are you particularly... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-01-03 165
115205 homework ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-01-03 2
115204 Are you willing to work overtime? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-01-03 143
115203 What is your lifelong dream? why? À±*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-03 2
115202 What are your New Year\'s resolutions. ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-03 829
115201 What are you looking forward to the most this new year? Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2022-01-03 1282
115200 my introduce ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-03 4
115199 About Han river park ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-03 232
115198 What can you get from listening to the radio? Àü*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-03 110
115197 Who is your favorite cartoon character? Àü*¼± ¿Ï·á 2022-01-03 149
115196 What new thing would you like to try this year? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-03 167
115195 I received my christmas present!!! ¿À*°á ¿Ï·á 2022-01-03 89
115194 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-03 214
115193 Homework ÀÌ*¼± ¿Ï·á 2022-01-03 1
115192 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-03 121

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04