¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Á¤*¿ø
2022-02-06 488

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Kindly answer the following in essay form.
What kind of celebration would you like for your birthday?

I just want to eat out with my family and eat my favorite food like beef stake and pasta. And then, I'd like to eat some cake. Also I want to be celebrated from my friends. They always send me some celebrative messages and gifts. Every birthday has been very good for me from first to last.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Won:)

That sounds like a fun birthday party!

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon!

I just want to eat out with my family and eat my favorite food like beef stake and pasta. 
>> CORRECT

And then, I'd like to eat some cake. 
>> CORRECT

Also I want to be celebrated from my friends. 
>> I also want to celebrate with my friends

They always send me some celebrative messages and gifts.
>> CORRECT 

Every birthday has been very good for me from first to last.
>> CORRECT 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
116023 Foreign creators excited over Korea\'s upcoming Hallyu visa À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-02-01 0
116022 Governmet to raise private gathering size limit to 6, keep 9 pm... À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-02-01 0
116021 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-02-01 1
116020 When was the last time you achieved a goal? How did you feel? ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-01-30 866
116019 Which beverages do you think are the most popular in the world... ½Å*ÈÄ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-30 1112
116018 Which is better: to complain or not to complain? Answer in a few... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-30 916
116017 Have a weekend!! °­*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-29 1161
116016 How do you feel and what happens to you when you don\'t get... ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-01-29 574
116015 The first time that my father touched my shoulder ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-29 423
116014 Talk about your best memory from a holiday ÀÌ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-29 1
116013 What do you think is interesting about your culture? À±*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-29 0
116012 What is your favorite tradition in South Korea? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-01-29 809
116011 Essay (Jan 28th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-01-28 695
116010 ielts task 1 ¼Û*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-01-28 723
116009 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-01-28 360
116008 What is your favorite tradition in South Korea? Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2022-01-28 433
116007 Homework ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-01-28 579
116006 Do you think it is best to argue or just walk away? ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-28 481
116005 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-28 345
116004 What motivates you to keep working? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-01-28 785

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04