¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Which one do you think is better, living with relatives or living alone? Explain your answer.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2022-05-04 499

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

In my opinion, living alone is much better than living with relatives.
First, there are a lot of differences between me and my relatives.
There are sometimes conflicts of opinions between me and my family, and me and my relatives will do so.
And also I just want to live alone if I don't have my own family.
Because of these reasons, living alone is much better than living with relatives for me.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John! 

Both has their pros and cons. It really depends on the person. Me, I prefer living alone because I like being independent.

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon

In my opinion, living alone is much better than living with relatives.
>> CORRECT

First, there are a lot of differences between me and my relatives.
>> CORRECT

There are sometimes conflicts of opinions between me and my family, and me and my relatives will do so.
>> Sometimes there are conflicts of opinions between me and my family. 

And also I just want to live alone if I don't have my own family.
>> Also, I want to live along even if I don't have my own family yet. 

Because of these reasons, living alone is much better than living with relatives for me. 
>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
118754 Korea Children\'s Day ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-04 477
118753 Which is a better way of studying English, online or face to... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-04 505
118752 Make sentence ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-04 396
118751 Do you think it\'s important to spend time by yourself? ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-05-04 533
118750 homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-04 453
118749 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-04 400
118748 Describe a boring movie you watched? ½Å*ÈÄ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-04 1
118747 Which one do you think is better, living with relatives or... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-04 499
118746 Wednesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-04 405
118745 homework ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-05-04 447
118744 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-04 377
118743 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-05-04 2
118742 Korean Ramen ÃÖ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-04 441
118741 The public transportation ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-04 1
118740 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-05-04 2
118739 How do you understand the statement: ¡®You only live once... ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2022-05-04 1116
118738 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-04 0
118737 Of course, but it¡¯s a burden to me because I have to pay ±è*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-04 592
118736 Apr 29th, 2022 ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-05-04 448
118735 normal life ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-04 458

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04