¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

6.14 Writing

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ³²*½Â
2022-06-14 457

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

What is your favorite place in your city and why?

In my city, there are a few places within ten minutes distance by driving near where I live now. A big pond around which I can take a walk and a huge theme park are among those. The former is what my wife likes to go and the latter is the place my daughter loves to go. Actually, we have the annual memberships for the park.

And we go to the East Sea thesedays since my daugher loves to play with the sand on the beach. The beach sand is really soft, compared to the on on the land

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Seung!  

Wow, you live in the wonderful place. There is a lot of access to beautiful cites. I'm happy for you! 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

In my city, there are a few places within ten minutes distance by driving near where I live now. 
>> In my city, there are a few places within ten minutes distance by driving, near where I live now. 
A big pondaround which I can take a walk and a huge theme park are among those. 
>> There is a big pond here where I can talk walks. There's also a huge theme park here. 

The former is what my wife likes to go and the latter is the place my daughter loves to go. 
>> The "Former" is the place where my wife likes to go to and the "Latter" is my daughter's favorite. 

Actually, we have the annual memberships for the park.
>> Actually, we have an annual memberships for the park.

And we go to the East Sea thesedays since my daugher loves to play with the sand on the beach. 
>> We usually go to the East Sea these days since my daughter loves to play with the sand on the beach. 

The beach sand is really soft, compared to the on on the land
>> The beach sand is really soft, compared to the ones on the land. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
118996 In our country, there are some common practices. First, the... ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 417
118995 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 298
118994 How would you describe an ideal weekend? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 366
118993 homework Á¤*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 2
118992 Do you think bullying should be made a crime or is it part of... ½Å*ÈÄ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 0
118991 homework Á¤*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 354
118990 homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 404
118989 Describe the most interesting person you met on one of your... ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 376
118988 What is your opinion about the increasing number of unmarried... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 437
118987 Is there something you wish you could do with your free time but... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 300
118986 Friday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 276
118985 HOMEWORK: ¹®*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 309
118984 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 3
118983 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 356
118982 The most interesting person I met on one of my travels. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 509
118981 Education ÃÖ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 456
118980 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 434
118979 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 1
118978 name of school ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 405
118977 Strange food in China Àå*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 314

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04