¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Àå*È£
2022-07-29 994

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

My hometown is typically called bedtown. In Korea, bedtown means cities of around the capital. They are close to Seoul and got a convenient trasportation system. Most people who living in bedtown, go to Seoul to work because most of the companies are concentrated in Seoul. So most Bucheon people who go to seoul to work seem tired from monday to friday. However, Buchoen turn into energetic city when weekends. In the park, a huge number of people take a walk with their dogs and cats. Also they come out to playground to exercise.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Yeong Ho!
I can really see your improvement when it comes to writing. You can now create great sentences with correct grammar. Keep it up!
-T. Caitlyn
My hometown is typically called bedtown. 
>> CORRECT
In Korea, bedtown means cities of around the capital. 
>>In Korea, bedtown means cities around the capital. 
They are close to Seoul and got a convenient trasportation system. 
>> They are close to Seoul and have a convenient transportation system. 
Most people who living in bedtown, go to Seoul to work because most of the companies are concentrated in Seoul. 
>> Most people living in bedtown go to Seoul to work because most of the companies are concentrated in Seoul. 
So most Bucheon people who go to seoul to work seem tired from monday to friday. 
>> So most people from Bucheon who goes to work in Seoul seem tired from Monday to Friday. 
However, Buchoen turn into energetic city when weekends. 
>> However, Buchoen turns into an energetic city on weekends. 
In the park, a huge number of people take a walk with their dogs and cats. 
>>CORRECT
Also they come out to playground to exercise.
>>Also, they come out to the playground to exercise.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
119712 How long do you want to live? Please discuss your answer. ±è*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 722
119711 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 674
119710 My parents told me about getting married. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 552
119709 How would you describe your family? / What is your ideal family... ±è*¼Ò ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 619
119708 homework ¿ø*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 672
119707 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 3
119706 Do you think we will be able to cure cancer one day? What can we... ½Å*ÈÄ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 1
119705 About climate and weather ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 7
119704 What are some good points about social networking? What are some... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 610
119703 How important is farming in your country? And Why? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 978
119702 Do you think it is good to always ask for suggestions? Why or... ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 678
119701 home work ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 738
119700 What do you think is the best job in the world? Why? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 599
119699 Wednesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 577
119698 homeworrk ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 573
119697 What is the best historical place there in South Korea and why? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 0
119696 What do you think is the best job in the world? Why? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 0
119695 homework ÀÌ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 677
119694 Do you prefer to go shopping or just browse? Why? 20220606... Le* ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 733
119693 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 1010

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04