¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What is your opinion about the all-day schooling policy?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2022-08-18 988

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Child-caring is the most serious social problem that our sociey has to solve. Most households have a difficulty to find nanny due to the service fees and service quality. It is not easy to live someone who we haven't met before, It usually takes time to fully believe a helper. So, many parents ask their mother to take care of their children because they can save money and gurantee children's safety. If the government provide proper service, I am willing to use it but all-day schooling has a lot of problem. Firstly, it will lower the quality of education. Secondly, students might feel lonely because they spend most time at school. I guess that few students would use the service because parents feel sorry for their children to send them in these facilities for a long time. Many students will go home after school or when their parents come back home from the work. Lastly, we already have after-school classes that are provided until 8 p.m. I think that it would be better if there is a supp

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Sir Hwang!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

Child-caring is the most serious social problem that our sociey has to solve. 
>> CORRECT!
Most households have a difficulty to find nanny due to the service fees and service quality. 
>> Most households have a difficulty to find a nanny due to the service fees and service quality. 
OR >> Most households have a difficulty to find nannies due to the service fees and service quality. 
It is not easy to live someone who we haven't met before, It usually takes time to fully believe a helper. 
>> It is not easy to live someone who we haven't met before; it usually takes time to fully believe a helper. 
So, many parents ask their mother to take care of their children because they can save money and gurantee children's safety. 
>> CORRECT!
If the government provide proper service, I am willing to use it but all-day schooling has a lot of problem.
>> If the government provide proper service, I am willing to use it but all-day schooling has a lot of problems.
Firstly, it will lower the quality of education. 
>> CORRECT!
Secondly, students might feel lonely because they spend most time at school. 
>>  Secondly, students might feel lonely because they spend most of their time at school. 
I guess that few students would use the service because parents feel sorry for their children to send them in these facilities for a long time. 
>> CORRECT!
Many students will go home after school or when their parents come back home from the work. 
>> Many students will go home after school or when their parents come back home from work. 
Lastly, we already have after-school classes that are provided until 8 p.m. 
>> CORRECT!
I think that it would be better if there is a supp
>> I think it would be better if there is a support coming from the government.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
120344 6/30 HOMEWORK(PLEASE CHEER... ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-30 683
120343 Which matters more to you: skill, appearance, or character? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-06-30 1
120342 What do you usually do with your brothers for fun? ÇÑ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-30 963
120341 What do you do to save as much electricity as possible during... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-06-30 1118
120340 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-30 851
120339 My Interview story (I will send answers of the questions in... À¯*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-30 778
120338 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-06-30 3
120337 [ Homework ]Q. What is the most famous sport in Korea? Why? ÃÖ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-30 1
120336 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-30 821
120335 can you give some examples when the common man has an edge over... ½Å*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-06-30 705
120334 Can you think of some reason why people don\'t keep dogs or cats? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-30 1380
120333 Homework For 06.29.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-30 5
120332 What would you like to receive on your next birthday? ±è*°â ¿Ï·á 2022-06-30 1002
120331 What is the most effective way to save endangered species? ¹é*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-06-30 1007
120330 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-30 886
120329 If you could relive one moment in your life, what would it be?... ¹é*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-06-30 1086
120328 Tell me something that not a lot of people know about you. ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-30 959
120327 family dinner ¼­*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-30 624
120326 What government policy do you find very helpful for you? Answer... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-30 668
120325 Can the government do anything to improve people¡¯s health? Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-30 1072

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04