¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*´Ô
2024-03-22 2141

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think Having a vice is habit.
It is influenced by environmental.
People¡¯s disposition is natural but also can be changed by others.such as national,parents and friends.
Most of all right judgement and strong willingness are important to make their disposition.
So people can fix their vice.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Ms. Sunny!
Let's have a comparison of vices and habits 
While bad habits can have detrimental effects, they are generally seen as less severe and are more about personal improvement. On the other hand, a 'vice' is a more serious and morally weighted term. It usually denotes a practice or habit considered immoral, sinful, or harmful to oneself or others.
Habits can be both good and bad. example of a good habit is her habit of waking up early and jogging for 30 minutes before going to work.
Thank you for this!
Aki~

I think Having a vice is habit.
>> I think Having a vice is a habit.

It is influenced by environmental.
>>> It is influenced by the environment.

People¡¯s disposition is natural but also can be changed by others.such as national,parents and friends.
>>> People¡¯s disposition is natural but also can be changed by others. such as national, parents, and friends.

Most of all right judgement and strong willingness are important to make their disposition.
>>> Most of all right judgment and strong willingness are important to make their disposition.

So people can fix their vice.
>>> So people can fix their vices.
>>> Still, people can quit their vices.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
135767 HOMEWORK FOR 03.22.2024 WRITING TASK: What are the harmful... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-03-22 3
135766 eating out ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-22 2973
135765 Why is reading a good hobby? / How would you describe a perfect... ÀÌ*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2024-03-22 2212
135764 test Te*002 ¿Ï·á 2024-03-22 278
135763 test Te*002 ¿Ï·á 2024-03-22 416
135762 Which one is better, too confident or nervous but prepared? ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-03-22 2
135761 Toothpaste technology ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-22 2692
135760 homework2 ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-03-22 2476
135759 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-03-22 2141
135758 Homework ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-03-22 1
135757 What¡¯s your favorite shop? ¿À*¼Ò ¿Ï·á 2024-03-22 1
135756 Do you prefer shopping alone or with others? ¿À*¼Ò ¿Ï·á 2024-03-22 1
135755 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-03-22 2
135754 homework À¯*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-03-21 2619
135753 Homework Àå*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-21 2467
135752 homework 03.21 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-03-21 2242
135751 What is your view of men using cosmetics? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-03-21 2
135750 What are your hobbies? Write at least two hobbies and explain... Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-21 3140
135749 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-03-21 0
135748 What kind of vehicle would you like to have in the future?... Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-03-21 2890

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04