¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*´Ô
2024-11-06 1777

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Our government gives a lot of benefits to the people.
Especially baby's moms and elderly have more it.
Elderly's Basic pension system have been introduced for 10 years.
70% of over 65 year old can get a pension from government.
And also government gives the jobs which is kind of picking some garbage.
So elderly can recieve 600 dollars everymonth.
My mom goes to free restaurant served by government for lunch.
Many benefits are following for them .
But many old people can't afford their hospital fee.
If their symptoms are seriously.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Ms. Sunny!
People who pay taxes are delighted when we see where our taxes are going. It should be given for the welfare of the citizen and not for the politician only.
Have a great day!
Aki~

Our government gives a lot of benefits to the people.
>>> CORRECT!

Especially baby's moms and elderly have more it.
>>> Especially for new moms and elderly people.

Elderly's Basic pension system have been introduced for 10 years.
>>> Elderly's basic pension system has been introduced for 10 years.

70% of over 65 year old can get a pension from government.
>>> 70% of those over 65 years old can get a pension from the government.

And also government gives the jobs which is kind of picking some garbage.
>>> And also the government gives easy jobs like picking up some garbage.

So elderly can recieve 600 dollars everymonth.
>>> So these elderly people can receive 600 dollars every month.

My mom goes to free restaurant served by government for lunch.
>>> My mom goes to a free restaurant served by the government for lunch.

Many benefits are following for them .
>>> CORRECT!

But many old people can't afford their hospital fee.
>>> But many old people can't afford their hospital fees.

If their symptoms are seriously.
>>>  If their symptoms are serious.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
140450 How can we show everyone is equal? ÃÖ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-16 2156
140449 Deadlines for my daughters ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-16 1839
140448 HOMEWORK FOR 10.11.2024 WRITING TASK: If you could watch a movie... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-10-16 4
140447 HOMEWORK FOR 10.04.2024 WRITING TASK: If you can learn another... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-10-16 3
140446 Oct 14th homework ¾È*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-15 1583
140445 Homework ¿À*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-10-15 1
140444 Homework 10/15 ¿À*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-15 1681
140443 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-10-15 1
140442 Home work ½Å*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-10-15 1577
140441 What are you most scared of? ¹Ú*½Ä ¿Ï·á 2024-10-15 1841
140440 14oct2024- Homework. ±è*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-10-15 1661
140439 home work Àå*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-10-15 2069
140438 How often do you eat out? Who do you usually eat out with? Where... ¼­*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-15 3
140437 Relaxing ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-15 2444
140436 Q) Do you like exercising outdoors? ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-15 2
140435 Do you always care for strangers? Why or why not? ÇÑ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-15 1891
140434 HOMEWORK FOR 09.30.2024 Writing task: Are you an introvert or an... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-10-15 2
140433 Have you ever dreamt about something that later came true? ±è*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-10-15 2007
140432 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-10-15 2562
140431 Homework Àå*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-15 1861

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04