¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What surprised you the most about your experiences with shamanism in Japan?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ³ë*ö
2025-01-24 1576

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

While traveling in Japan, we can see that there are various temples in Japan, from small to large temples in the city center.
The first thing that surprised me was that there were so many temples.
I later learned that there are also special places on a small scale for ceremonies in private houses like temples.
In general, when we think of shamanism, we can think that older generations are more dependent on shamanism than younger generations.
The most surprising thing is that in Japan, many younger generations join hands in temples and pray reverently.
What was unusual was that before putting their hands together, they hit them like clapping their hands a few times and make a sound before praying.
In the town by the sea in Korea, they always keep their own shamanistic rituals to return the ship without an accident.
Japan is also an island country, so I think it will be similar.
I think the environment affects our lifestyle and religion, so it appears like this.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi David! Your sentences are thoughtful and well-organized, and they reflect a clear understanding of cultural differences and practices. A couple of minor adjustments were made to enhance clarity and flow, but overall, your ideas are expressed effectively. Keep up the great work!


~ T. Lia


While traveling in Japan, we can see that there are various temples in Japan, from small to large temples in the city center.
>> While traveling in Japan, we can see that there are various temples, from small to large ones in the city center.


The first thing that surprised me was that there were so many temples.
>> CORRECT


I later learned that there are also special places on a small scale for ceremonies in private houses like temples.
>> I later learned that there are also special small-scale places for ceremonies in private houses, similar to temples.


In general, when we think of shamanism, we can think that older generations are more dependent on shamanism than younger generations.
>> In general, when we think of shamanism, we can conclude that older generations are more dependent on it than younger generations.


The most surprising thing is that in Japan, many younger generations join hands in temples and pray reverently.

>> The most surprising thing is that in Japan, many young people join hands in temples and pray reverently.


What was unusual was that before putting their hands together, they hit them like clapping their hands a few times and make a sound before praying.

>> What was unusual was that before putting their hands together, they clapped a few times to make a sound before praying.


In the town by the sea in Korea, they always keep their own shamanistic rituals to return the ship without an accident.
>> In the town by the sea in Korea, they always follow their shamanistic rituals to ensure the ship returns without an accident.


Japan is also an island country, so I think it will be similar.
>> CORRECT


I think the environment affects our lifestyle and religion, so it appears like this.
>> I think the environment affects our lifestyle and religion, which results in this.



¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
142392 HOMEWORK ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-02-10 0
142391 The only way to have a friend is to be one ±è*·É ¿Ï·á 2025-02-10 398
142390 What do you think are the negative effects of tourism? °­*À² ¿Ï·á 2025-02-09 3
142389 What kind of music do you listen to when you\'re sad? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2025-02-09 1640
142388 Have you ever tried any extreme sports? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2025-02-09 1522
142387 What kind of news do you often read or watch? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2025-02-09 1703
142386 vested rights ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-09 1509
142385 Talk about the most interesting book that you read. ÀÓ*ºñ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-09 1530
142384 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-02-09 1
142383 Who would you like to see perform live, and why? Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-09 2
142382 Homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-09 1433
142381 Homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-09 1493
142380 Homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-09 1689
142379 Do you think you need pocket money? Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-09 1608
142378 To what extent should parents be involved in their children\'s... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2025-02-09 1533
142377 Do you like your neighborhood? ¼®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2025-02-09 1397
142376 What are the limits of human reasoning? ¼Û*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-08 2
142375 parents or school ¾î*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-08 2
142374 Are you satisfied with your government\'s response to climate... ±Ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-02-08 3
142373 What is the best benefit for an employee? Why? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2025-02-08 1804

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04