¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

How do you think we can better protect ourselves from the flu?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ³ë*ö
2025-02-05 1374

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I had the flu twice about five years ago.
I know that the flu is completely different from a severe cold because I have experienced it.
Looking back at that time, I had an environment where I could get the flu easily.
I think two things are important to prevent the flu.
First, we should look back on our eating habits.
It is necessary for us to have a balanced eating habits.
It is important to eat foods rich in vitamin C and fiber.
In the end, these habits have the effect of enhancing our immunity.
And secondly, we have to exercise regularly.
Flu is mostly prevalent in the cold winter.
The cold weather makes us lazy to exercise.
This habit eventually increases the chances of getting the flu.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi David. Your response presents a clear and well-structured discussion on flu prevention. You effectively highlight the importance of a balanced diet and regular exercise, making your points easy to understand. Your reasoning is solid, and your writing demonstrates a strong grasp of the topic. Keep up the good work!


~ T. Lia


I had the flu twice about five years ago.
>> CORRECT


I know that the flu is completely different from a severe cold because I have experienced it.
>> CORRECT


Looking back at that time, I had an environment where I could get the flu easily.
>> Looking back at that time, I was in an environment where I could easily catch the flu.


I think two things are important to prevent the flu.
>> CORRECT


First, we should look back on our eating habits.
>> CORRECT


It is necessary for us to have a balanced eating habits.
>> It is necessary for us to have balanced eating habits.


It is important to eat foods rich in vitamin C and fiber.
>> CORRECT


In the end, these habits have the effect of enhancing our immunity.

>> In the end, these habits help enhance our immunity.


And secondly, we have to exercise regularly.
>> Secondly, we have to exercise regularly.


Flu is mostly prevalent in the cold winter.
>> The flu is most prevalent during the cold winter.


The cold weather makes us lazy to exercise.
>> The cold weather makes us feel too lazy to exercise.


This habit eventually increases the chances of getting the flu.
>> This habit eventually increases the risk of getting the flu.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
141420 Tell me how orchestra concerts influence your emotions and... ³ë*ö ¿Ï·á 2024-12-10 2051
141419 What changes would you like to see in your country\'s... ÇÑ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-10 1909
141418 If you could only pack three things for a sleepover, what would... ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-12-10 1807
141417 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-12-10 1964
141416 Will you agree to a friend if he asks you to trade places? ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-10 1860
141415 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-12-09 1
141414 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-09 1712
141413 What are effective ways to keep our minds sharp as we age? Do... ½Å*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-12-09 1948
141412 Do you think celebrities should take a stand on political or... ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-09 2547
141411 How do you feel when someone is kind to you? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-12-09 1837
141410 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-09 1877
141409 What volunteer work do you see yourself doing? Why? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-09 1766
141408 Should beauty standards include people of all shapes, sizes, and... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-09 2098
141407 What part does luck play in success? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-09 2143
141406 Homework ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-09 1688
141405 Is it fair to punish children for making mistakes? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-09 2033
141404 What¡¯s your favorite part of having a friend stay over at your... ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-12-09 2021
141403 ¡°How My Daily Routine Reflects My Personal Growth¡± ³ë*ö ¿Ï·á 2024-12-09 1789
141402 Please change difficult words to easy words and correct them so... ÀÌ*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-09 1689
141401 Please change difficult words to easy words and correct them so... ÀÌ*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-09 2142

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04