¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*¹Î
2025-04-04 389

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

What are some reasons why privacy is important for you?

A: There are some reasons why privacy is important for me. First, I love my own free time that I can rest alone and I can fully get energy and heal my mind during the time. I often run out of my energy to maintain my relationship. So privacy is really important for me! And since I have some secrets that I want to hide from anyone, I don¡¯t want to reveal my diary or kakao talk.Sometimes I wrote my thoughts about my friends and my family. I can reduce stress by writing my honest emotions

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Yumin

A very exciting day to you! Thank you so much in submitting your homework.

Keep practicing on your grammar and you'll see that you'll have improvements that you don't even notice at all. ^^

See you in our class! Sweet day!

-T.Jeny


There are some reasons why privacy is important for me. 
>>There are some reasons why privacy is important to me. 
First, I love my own free time that I can rest alone and I can fully get energy and heal my mind during the time.
>>First, I love my free time, when I can rest alone, gain full energy, and heal my mind.
 I often run out of my energy to maintain my relationship. 
>> I often run out of energy to maintain my relationship. 
So privacy is really important for me!
>>So privacy is really important to me!
 And since I have some secrets that I want to hide from anyone, I don¡¯t want to reveal my diary or kakao talk.
>>Correct
Sometimes I wrote my thoughts about my friends and my family. 
>>Correct
I can reduce stress by writing my honest emotions
>>Correct
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
142607 homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-19 900
142606 Homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-19 952
142605 If you could compare your self to anyone, who would it be and... Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-19 843
142604 homework ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2025-02-19 1057
142603 ±ÝÀÏ ¼ö¾÷ µÚ·Î ¿¬±â( 02/19 ¿¡¼­ 21ÀÏ·Î) ±è*¿ë ¿Ï·á 2025-02-19 989
142602 What\'s the biggest amount of money you lent or gave to someone... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-19 878
142601 Can cancel culture be considered a form of bullying? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2025-02-19 816
142600 homework ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2025-02-19 1055
142599 What do you think is the biggest change in how families are in... ¼­*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-18 2
142598 Studying during the day vs Studying at night? ¼Õ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-18 984
142597 Homework5 ±è* ¿Ï·á 2025-02-18 899
142596 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-02-18 2
142595 Patient Hospitalization question ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2025-02-18 6
142594 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-18 862
142593 Memory ÀÓ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-18 877
142592 Why do you want study English. ÀÌ*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-18 829
142591 When do you see a doctor? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-18 3
142590 The homework for Fab 17th. Á¶*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-18 844
142589 The creator ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-02-18 0
142588 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-18 896

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04