¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Should children be allowed to use the internet freely? why? or why not?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¿À*¿µ
2025-05-23 551

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

When I checked the this question I think in my son's case ,at first.
If I would imagine the situation after allowing to use internet freely for my son, it will be horrible.
These youth included my son don't have restrict judgement and they have curious a lot.
Unintentionally, they can take dangerous situations easily, like real crimes or bad news.
Honestly, It has many advantages of using the internet, and we cannot think of far from the virtual world anymore. But, they have to learn and grow their correct knowledge, first.
Therefore my answer is no, because their judgement is not ripe, yet.

Hello, Elly.
Finally, it is on Friday.
But, I don't know why I'm not excited today.
Anyway, I'll try my best at work, too, because next day is on Saturday.
I have a plan to go tracking with my dog and son to Kangwon-do.
There is far from here, but it will be fresh air, because the accommodation is in the middle of a forest.
Have a nice weekend.
See you in next class.
Thank you.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Stella,
Thank you for taking the time to answer this essay. :)
I agree with your sentiment. The internet is a dangerous place, especially for kids if not used correctly.
So, I think it's good to let them use the internet, but with the adults' guidance and in moderation.


Wow! You have a lovely plan this weekend. I hope it won't be too hot tomorrow.
Have fun and make good memories. :)
- Teacher Elly~



When I checked the this question I think in my son's case ,at first.
>> When I checked this question, I first thought of my son's case

If I would imagine the situation after allowing to use internet freely for my son, it will be horrible.
>> If I imagine the situation after allowing my son to use the internet freely, it would be horrible.
OR >> If I were to imagine the situation after allowing my son to use the internet freely, it would be horrible.

These youth included my son don't have restrict judgement and they have curious a lot.
>> These young people, including my son, don't have strong judgment and are very curious.

Unintentionally, they can take dangerous situations easily, like real crimes or bad news.
>> Unintentionally, they can easily see or come across dangerous content, such as real crimes or bad news.
OR >> Unintentionally, they can easily encounter dangerous situations, such as real crimes or disturbing news.

Honestly, It has many advantages of using the internet, and we cannot think of far from the virtual world anymore. 
>> Honestly, there are many advantages to using the internet, and we can no longer imagine being disconnected from the virtual world
OR >> Honestly, there are many advantages to using the internet, and we can no longer imagine life without the virtual world.

But, they have to learn and grow their correct knowledge, first.
>> But they have to learn and develop accurate knowledge first.
OR >> However, young people must first develop the right knowledge and understanding.

Therefore my answer is no, because their judgement is not ripe, yet.
>> My answer is no, as their judgment is not yet ripe.
OR >> Therefore, my answer is no, because their judgment is not yet mature.

Hello, Elly.
>> CORRECT

Finally, it is on Friday.
>> Finally, it is Friday.

But, I don't know why I'm not excited today.
>> 
But I don't know why I'm not excited today

Anyway, I'll try my best at work, too, because next day is on Saturday.
>> Anyway, I'll try my best at work too, because tomorrow is Saturday.
OR >> Anyway, I'll try my best at work, too, because the next day is Saturday.

I have a plan to go tracking with my dog and son to Kangwon-do.
>> I have a plan to go trekking with my dog and son to Kangwon-do.

There is far from here, but it will be fresh air, because the accommodation is in the middle of a forest.
>> It is far from here, but there will be fresh air because the accommodation is in the middle of a forest.

Have a nice weekend.
>> CORRECT

See you in next class.
>> See you in the next class.

Thank you.
>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
143833 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-25 1
143832 homework ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2025-04-25 684
143831 People compete in sports, games, the economy, and many other... ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2025-04-25 716
143830 How do you balance studying for multiple exams? ±è*¿î ¿Ï·á 2025-04-25 582
143829 ¤Ó Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-25 766
143828 what are your thought on the four-day work week? ¿À*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-25 895
143827 What¡¯s one thing you¡¯re most excited about at your son\'s... ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-25 722
143826 Birthday present that I want to receive is tumbler. À¯*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-04-25 717
143825 Is it okay to say no when someone asks for a favor? Why or why... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-25 642
143824 Is there a time when forgetting something turned out to be a... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-25 752
143823 Do you think a planner helps you stay organized or simply gives... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-25 713
143822 ¤Ó Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-25 699
143821 0424 IELTS writing Task2 homework ¼Û*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-25 0
143820 Discuss your earliest memory as a child. ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-25 728
143819 Homework ¼Û*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-04-25 2
143818 massage with tools ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-25 666
143817 What is the most popular sport in your country? ¿©*Âù ¿Ï·á 2025-04-25 1
143816 Homework ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-04-25 1
143815 homework ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2025-04-25 721
143814 4/24 Homework ±Ç*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-04-25 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04