무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Which do you prefer: more money or increased popularity?

작성자: 김*경
2025-05-28 129

회원님의 영작문

I’d prefer more money to popularity because popularity is more useless and volatile than money. But I don’t claim that money is everlasting. Money could fly away anytime without my knowing it. As the time goes by, I came to know the power of money and why people can obsessed with having more money.
To say roughly it, popularity supported by money can’t last for a long time. What can you please people with? you would need to treat them with dinner. Or you would need a fancy and expensive suit to make you more charming. In short, to maintain your popularity takes money as well as time or efforts. So I would prefer the more fundamental thing under everything. However, I don’t think money can be a key to all problems. For example, true relationship can come from only love, which I can’t buy with much money.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Good evening, Steve!^^

Yes, being well-known can frequently result in earning money, but wealth can also provide one a sense of stability and financial security. Along with the chance to save for the future, it can enable people to cover their essential expenses, like housing, food, and medical care.
Each has advantages and disadvantages.

Thank you for completing your composition. See you tomorrow!

__T. Mayleen :)


I’d prefer more money to popularity because popularity is more useless and volatile than money.
>>> CORRECT
>>> OR: I'd rather have more money than popularity because popularity is less useful and fickle than money.
But I don’t claim that money is everlasting. Money could fly away anytime without my knowing it.
>>> But I don't claim that money is everlasting. Money could fly away anytime without me knowing it.
>>> OR: But I do not argue that money is eternal. Money could fly away at any time without my knowledge.
As the time goes by, I came to know the power of money and why people can obsessed with having more money.
>>> As the time went by, I came to know the power of money and why people can be obsessed with having more money.
To say roughly it, popularity supported by money can’t last for a long time.
>>> To say it roughly, popularity supported by money can't last for a long time.
What can you please people with? you would need to treat them with dinner. Or you would need a fancy and expensive suit to make you more charming.
>>> What can you please people with? You would need to treat them to dinner, or you would need a fancy and expensive suit to make you more charming.
In short, to maintain your popularity takes money as well as time or efforts.
>>> In short, to maintain your popularity takes money as well as time or effort.
So I would prefer the more fundamental thing under everything.
>>> So I would prefer the more fundamental thing over everything.
However, I don’t think money can be a key to all problems. For example, true relationship can come from only love, which I can’t buy with much money.
>>> However, I don't think money can be a key to all problems. For example, a true relationship can come from only love, which I can't buy with any amount of money.

Enable GingerCannot connect to Ginger Check your internet connection
or reload the browserDisable GingerRephraseRephrase with Ginger (Ctrl+Alt+E)
Edit in GingerGinger is checking your text for mistakes...×
번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
144239 Are you the type of person who would help someone who has passed... 임* 완료 2025-05-22 1
144238 Writing Exercise: In 5 sentences, please write your expectations... 조*수 완료 2025-05-22 200
144237 . 김*인 완료 2025-05-22 0
144236 What are some risks of embracing YOLO fully in life? 임*미 완료 2025-05-22 194
144235 Homework for today 엄*린 완료 2025-05-22 2
144234 Homework for today 엄*린 완료 2025-05-22 174
144233 The homework of 22rd May. 조*호 완료 2025-05-22 179
144232 homework 박*욱 완료 2025-05-22 227
144231 homework 박*욱 완료 2025-05-22 221
144230 Do you feel safe when using the internet? 권*진 완료 2025-05-22 1
144229 homework 김*연 완료 2025-05-21 0
144228 dd 김*일 완료 2025-05-21 1
144227 What do you think are the main reasons some people still... 김*경 완료 2025-05-21 228
144226 Can a nation’s economic policy influence its international... 김*경 완료 2025-05-21 223
144225 What is the most popular amusement park in your country, and why... 이*윤 완료 2025-05-21 200
144224 What do you do if you can’t reach a company’s customer service? 윤*인 완료 2025-05-21 0
144223 Homework 김*우 완료 2025-05-21 1
144222 New4 이*인 완료 2025-05-21 209
144221 New3 이*인 완료 2025-05-21 212
144220 New2 이*인 완료 2025-05-21 199

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]