¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Why is overindulging in food not good?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*Áø
2025-06-13 200

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Overindulging in food is bad because it would make people unhealthy.
If we get over indulged into a foods, we will eat more than we should. Eating right amount is very important because if it goes over your amount, then it would cause stomachache and you would feel dullness. Also, you would not feel guilty about what you¡¯re eating so you might eat food that are unhealthy. If you get overindulged in food, you would eat fritters which is very oily
In conclusion, enjoying a food is good, but you should not be overindulged and try to eat healthy food during your meal.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Thank you once again for this Eugene. Enjoy your weekend!

Overindulging in food is bad because it would make people unhealthy.
>>> correct  
If we get over indulged into a foods, we will eat more than we should. 
>>>  If we indulged into foods, we will eat more than we should.  
Eating right amount is very important because if it goes over your amount, then it would cause stomachache and you would feel dullness. 
>>>  Eating the right amount is very important because if it goes over your required amount, then it would cause stomachache and you would feel dullness.  
Also, you would not feel guilty about what you¡¯re eating so you might eat food that are unhealthy. 
>>>  correct    
If you get overindulged in food, you would eat fritters which is very oily
>>>  If you overindulge in food, you would eat fritters which are very oily/greasy.
In conclusion, enjoying a food is good, but you should not be overindulged and try to eat healthy food during your meal.
>>>  In conclusion, enjoying food is good, but you should not be overindulged and try to eat healthy food during your meal. 
>>>  OR: In conclusion, enjoying food is good, but you should not overindulge and try to eat healthy food during your meal. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
144260 Homework for today ¾ö*¸° ¿Ï·á 2025-05-23 1
144259 HOMEWORK: Writing Exercise: Is pollution a big problem in your... Á¶*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2025-05-23 651
144258 We can\'t stop global warming, but what can we do to make it... ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-23 6
144257 Perfect weekend ¼Û*Çö ¿Ï·á 2025-05-23 10
144256 Homework ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2025-05-23 546
144255 . ±è*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-23 2
144254 Should children be allowed to use the internet freely? why? or... ¿À*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-23 574
144253 Describe a friend\'s personality and why you enjoy spending time... ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2025-05-23 625
144252 ¤Ó Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-23 642
144251 ¤Ó Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-23 610
144250 HOEMWORK ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-05-23 0
144249 Homework ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2025-05-23 579
144248 D6 essay homework ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2025-05-23 654
144247 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-22 0
144246 Do you think survey results can really help companies or... À±*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-22 0
144245 Should the government of Greece renovate the Acropolis to... ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-22 1
144244 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-05-22 1
144243 What is the best animated Hally Wood movie you\'ve ever watched... Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-22 652
144242 Can people easily buy medicine at Korean pharmacies even without... Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-22 549
144241 0521 IELTS writing Task2 homework ¼Û*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-22 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04