¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Writing task

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¾Æ
2021-05-10 594

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Q) Do you think women should only stay at home while men should only work for the family?

A)
No, absolutely not. Both men and women should be given the opportunity to do economic activity and social activity, and this is connected to basic freedom. Breaking gender stereotypes is a task for all of us.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Laura!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Here are some of the corrections, but other than that, you really did great. :) Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

Q) Do you think women should only stay at home while men should only work for the family?


A)
No, absolutely not. 
>> CORRECT!

Both men and women should be given the opportunity to do economic activity and social activity, and this is connected to basic freedom. 
>> CORRECT!

Breaking gender stereotypes is a task for all of us.
>> CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
109294 Does China have good policies for its people? ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-06-10 2
109293 Homework (302) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-10 432
109292 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-06-10 423
109291 If you were planning a party on a very small budget, what would... ÀÌ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-10 479
109290 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-06-10 532
109289 Hi, Sharon. È«*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-06-10 0
109288 Should parents be held responsible for their children\'s... ÀÌ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-10 440
109287 homework ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-06-10 4
109286 Homework Ç¥*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-10 4
109285 Fill in the blanks ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-06-10 405
109284 I like the citrus scent the most! ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-06-10 428
109283 The extreme weather conditions ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-10 4
109282 If you were planning a party on a very small budget, what would... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-10 550
109281 Plan to expand substitute holiday system gaining traction ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-06-10 408
109280 Homework ½É*»ó ¿Ï·á 2021-06-10 443
109279 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-06-10 495
109278 homework Àü*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-10 423
109277 homework Àü*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-10 408
109276 What have made you look pale? ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-10 453
109275 If you were planning a party on a very small budget, what would... Çã*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2021-06-10 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04